Monica Bivas was born in Colombia South America, when she was 32 years old she and her husband were informed that she had severe endometriosis that had cause the double blockage of her fallopian tubes, so her only option to become a mom was In Vitro Fertilization (IVF). Even after doing a laparoscopy to try to unblocked them it didn’t work so IVF was now the real only option. Her husband Moshe Bivas was supporting all the way, however the emotional stress was very heavy on both of them. Her first cycle was successful, they retrieve 34 eggs and 14 fertilized , 4 were transferred and she was a mom of a girl whom today is 14 years old. She thought it was so easy that next cycle will be the same, but it was not…..
In 2009, Monica and Moshe decided to have a second baby. Due to a mistake made by the clinic in the dosage amount of medicine, Monica got OHSS and her cycle had to be cancelled. The RE offered them another cycle at no cost assuming their responsibility in this mistake.
This time Monica and Moshe decided to do chromosomal testing, because they wanted a baby boy. They had 4 embryos, 3 were male. The single female embryo was the less developed. They decided to transfer all 4 . Oddly enough, they got pregnant with that baby girl.
Monica’s pregnancy was good all the way, including the amniocentesis, which confirmed she was expecting a girl. Everything was normal. But no one knew that Monica was developing a blood issue. At 39 weeks, few days before the delivery due date, their baby girl Isabelle died in her womb due to a blood clot in the umbilical cord.
Monica had to deliver her anyway. Devastated and lost, She felt guilty for what happened. It was very painful and empty. So empty that Monica and Moshe pursue a 4th round of IVF less than 2 months later. Monica did get a positive test but from the sadness, the loss, the stress and the fear combined with other personal issues, She miscarried at 7 weeks.
In 2011, Monica and Moshe got to the point of being completely lost, with no sign of how to find their way again. Driven by fear and ego, their relationship with each other turned into a disaster and they almost got divorced.
They choose to made some changes . They choose love.
In 2012, Monica and Moshe decided to go for another round of IVF the 5th and final. This cycle was an amazing experience; full of love, healthy dialogue and peace. Which was a direct result of the internal struggles and then shifts They made, together, as a team.
This last round of IVF is their other girl whom now is 6 years old.
Monica is today and IVF, Fertility and life coach, she is the author of the book The IVF Planner. A Personal Journal to Organize your Journey Thorugh In vitro Fertilization (IVF) with Love & Positivity.
She also is the stepmother of an 18 year old Girl. She lives in NY with her husband and Daughters.